When dating my girl, I will admittedly mention that I had light pockets. We were still in university and I liked this iron mama so much after working for and with her, that I imagined asking her out. If I asked, would she have said yes? I often wondered.
See, I tried to keep myself from mixing business with pleasure…but I fell head over heels, with my Boss. At the time, she had got out from a relationship, lost an election, and I wanted to give her time to collect herself, even as I noticed her growing liking for me too. The campaign period for her elections, which she had tasked me to be at the center of, had made me get to study this woman’s weaknesses and strengths at the depth, helping me truly ask myself the hard question. Would I want to commit to her if I made a move to pursue her?
I gathered up courage to begin pursuing her, having asked her severally whether she was sure of what she was getting herself into. Boy did not go the mainstream way of acquiring wealth first so as to get the girl. Was an educated woman going to stand an unmonied man? Honestly, fast forward now, she keeps on proving me wrong, since along the coarse of our marriage too I have lacked money due to either ended contracts, being retrenched, failed business, among others. Some months into official dating, got pregnant, and that is the day where we did our pregnancy test together. I then did the toughest thing I had to do in my twenties… I asked her to be mine, Like a life partner.
She said YES!
Imagine, I did not even have a ring. Not even balloons and confetti or with a gift waiting her outside to unwrap. (Not that those additions to your D-day are bad-I just did not have the ability to do such.) She gave me her ring, which she wore on the index finger, and I just transferred it. That evening, with tears welling our eyes, we made a commitment that was to bind us, and has bound us to date. Some of my key lessons from that significant moment are:
It does not need to be expensive
My guy, you do not need to break a bank. This is not to devalue the role that money plays in making the world go round. Do not get me wrong. Assuming that the girl you are eyeing knows your financial status (pretending is a thing of the past), you should not be made to feel like you need to steal to impress. She will definitely be able to see through you and your ambitions and follow it. Hard for a 21st century girl to be that way? The beautiful ones are yet to be born my friend.
You will know when she loves you
Humans are made with an innate sensor, one that tells you whether you are in the right place or you are being tolerated. No kidding, there are great actors out here. They can charm you and put you in an emotional trap, even so, you shall know. Trust your instincts and look beyond that pretty face, giggles, the sweet perfume or amazing figure. Look deeper and listen more, you shall know if she is into you.
A love commitment is about two people primarily
It does not involve opinion from parents or friends as the core to consider. Neither is true love dictated its state by the societal pressures. It just exists and blossoms. You have to calm the voices that are influencing your mind, and make the decision on your own. At least that personal decision offers you enough confidence to pop the question. Remember, it is your life and hers. Do yourself a favor and consider your opinion first.
Living to that commitment promise is a daily choice
Tell you what, love sparks in the beginning, You can even feel your blood getting hot every time you listen to her voice. When you start getting to live together, you should know that everything you do shall have to be INTENTIONAL. Your journey to choosing each other for forever begins on that day she says Yes!
Brace yourself, pop the question. What is the worst that could happen? A No only means you can get back to trying again, while a YES is Life beginning a fresh.